Envy Me Not (yet)

Okay, here in am in Charlotte, getting all these email congratulations for Bob and I finishing the boat. Most of them contain references to us sitting on the stern, sipping cocktails and watching the sun go down. I fell compelled to tear a big hole in your happiness by telling you, in plain English: We are not doing this. We are not, in fact, even together. We are miles and lifestyles apart, right now. I am in Charlotte, doing Condo meetings and staying with Mom on occasion and lunching with friends and watching movies from the library and even TV (though only the three major channels, and only when the weather is right) and taking regular showers and washing my clothes one load at a time. BOB, on the other hand, is still at the boat, working his ass off, installing water tanks (he's going for two, and prepping the space for a future third), not taking showers (no water, no showers), eating out of cans and the frozen section of the local Food Lion. Trio is, we can all assume, filled to the gunwales with the chaotic tangle of tools, dirty rags, pipes, odds and ends of wood, metal, and wire that are ALWAYS part of Bob doing any work. I was told that a friend ducked his head into the boat the other day and said “Oh, Susan won't like this.” Bob told him that was exactly why I wasn't there.

So I will go back when he is done making messes and when my meetings are over, and eventually we'll get around to that sitting on the stern thing, watching the sun go down. Meanwhile, as a result of living this nearly conventional lifestyle, which is so different from how we normally live, I would like to make an observation:

I know the reason so many Americans struggle with their weight. TV. Too much sitting on our asses and watching it, AND-- and this is the part that just blows me away-- too many food commercials while we do! Good Grief! I have never in my life seen so much hot dripping butter, so many sizzling steaks, juicy hamburgers, twirls of whipped cream, yummy-looking pizzas. It's a wonder people don't jump in their cars and mob these restaurants, every time one of their commercials comes on. BUT THEY HAVE TO KEEP WATCHING TV, RIGHT????? So they do the next best thing. They raid their fridge or their cupboards for a substitute. But no way is it going to be as tasty as what they just saw in that commercial (which they THINK they've forgotten about, if they even realized it was motivating them in the first place), so they eat an extra amount of the inferior substitute, in an effort to feel the way they would have felt if they'd just finished off that steamed lobster and those crab-stuffed mushrooms, and the breadsticks, and the salad, and don't forget coffee and dessert. All I'm thinking is, if cigarette and liquor ads threaten the health of Americans, what is it that food ads are doing? Boosting the economy? I'm gonna go have a Scotch, a Twinkie and a smoke.